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USA Today recently interviewed me for a story on my book,Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.It's still shocks me that book spent 5 years on the New York Times Best Seller list, with 4 of those years at #1. You would think everyone has read it, but relationships are still failing because of common misunderstandings, poor communication and bad health.
I was so happy to see USA Today included my statement on ADHD, although they shortened it. If you missed it, I said, "Attentio...
He's threatened by my success. What gives?
My boyfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago because he tells me he is way too stressed at work, he feels too much pressure from me, and he is “threatened” by my situation and status. I have my own business, and live alone whereas he works, goes to college, and lives with his parents.I figured he needed cave time so I gave him space and a copy of Men Are From Mars. I emailed him that I was here to help. He replied that he needed to fix his situation in order to feel go...
My Employees Hate This Office Romance
I manage 2 employees who are very good friends. One is a married woman, the other an unmarried man. They obviously enjoy each other's company and spend a lot of time together. I have no idea whether they are romantically involved. The problem I am having is with my other employees. Many are uncomfortable with their closeness. Some assume they are having an affair, while others simply feel excluded.
I have not asked about their personal relationship directly, I did tell t...
How To Resolve Conflict In The Office
I manage two employees that do not like each other. It is starting to affect the morale of the other employees who are tired of the conflict. Both employees have come to me separately at different times to “tell” on the other one. It's got to the point where other employees have begun to take up sides to support one or the other. It is taking up so much of my time dealing with these two employees.
What can I do? How should I approach each employee and the entir...
My Coworkers Just Don't Like Me
My boss and my human resource manager both told me that people have been complaining about me in the office. My coworkers say I act superior and try to oversee their work. They feel that my genuine offers of assistance have been interfering with their work. Since I am the senior person in both age and experience, I try to help out when people have issues with their projects. I do have a strong personality, but I believe my suggestions are useful.
What am I doing wrong?
Who should pay for the date?
I have been with my girlfriend for about 6 months now. She seems very traditional in terms of us going out that as the man I always pick up the check. I love doing it but at the same time I would also love if she treated me sometimes too. I don't know what to do, it feels uncomfortable to tell my girlfriend I want her to spend money on me, to wine and dine me. I have subtly hinted but she’s never caught on. What should I do? Should I just accept that I’m the man...
My Manager Flirts With My Husband
I hope you can help me. My husband and I work in the same office with about 50 employees. This year, my husband and I got a new sales manager. She is younger and openly flirts with my husband. She touches him, hugs him, rubs his shoulders at his desk, and so forth. Our floor plan is open so I can see it, along with the entire office. One of my coworkers even said something to me about it this morning and I have started to get annoyed.
What should I do? I don’t want it to...
Their Office Affair Is Hurting Business
I loved Work with Me. Thank you for writing it. I got a good one for you. For the past two years, a secretary in our office has been having an affair with one of the executives. Both of them are married with young children. My problem is not with the affair itself, as these people are adults and can do as they please. However, the secretary has become so distracted by this relationship that her work has suffered considerably.
She used to be quite friendly with everyone, but no...
My Husband Doesn't Tell Me Certain Things
I just had a 3-day war with my husband who has started a fly-in, fly-out job in the mining industry (1 month on and one week at home).He started to drink at night and not tell me about it. We had a deal at the beginning of our relationship that he wouldn’t drink because it led to fights. So when I found out he was drinking again, I got hurt and upset.
I know it’s not big drinking – 5-6 beers when once a week when he is out with his coworkers. The problem is...
Help John! I'm Attracted To My Boss
I am a married with no kids and I have fallen in love with my boss. He is also married, but he has 2 kids. For about a year, we’ve been fighting a strong attraction for each other. We have tried to be professional and disregard these feelings, but it’s obvious we both have feelings for each other and attraction is hard to ignore.
We work together very closely and we will begin traveling with a team of co-workers next month. I am nervous that things could escalate...
Now that we live together, we don't get along
I have been living with my boyfriend for 3 months and we have been together for 2 years. Lately we’ve been bickering more often and our communication seems to shut down. He pulls away and I get sad. It’s hard when this happens because we used to never be like this. Yesterday he said he needed space from me. He said he's mad he needs to tell me where he is, and I expressed it makes me feel safe to know. I am scared he is pulling away. How can I handle this witho...
My Kids Don't Like My New Husband
I am 47 years old and have 2 grown children, ages 27 and 23. I have always had a wonderful relationship with both of them.
When my daughter had troubles with her now fiance I was very supportive of what she was going through and offered sound advice. I'm happy to say they made their way through the troubles and are now planning a wedding. I couldn't be happier for her!
My son is married to a wonderful gal who I think of as my own daughter. They have 1 son and a...
My Boyfriend Is Stressed and Depressed
My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and we have had our fair share of ups and downs, but through it all our relationship has gotten stronger.
A few months into our relationship my boyfriend stated that he needed a break. After not speaking for a couple of weeks he called me and we talked. Our relationship has been going strong ever since.
The past few months my boyfriend has been under a tremendous amount of stress - his dog died, he lost his job, found a ...
He Hates My Low Sex Drive
My boyfriend and I have had a small falling out. The situation was that he wanted sex right then and there but I just can't do that.
I seldom feel horny, which upsets me and it is something I want to work on.
He was making fun of how I need some prep before I want sex and it really frustrated me so I responded in anger by throwing his arms off me and saying "don't make fun of something I take seriously, please, I don't like it." to which he said &q...
My Girlfriend Still Texts Her Ex
My girlfriend has a very strange and close relationship with her ex-boyfriend and I have always felt uncomfortable with their closeness.
She has tells me that it is completely platonic and just puppy love from high school. I was aware when we started dating that he was part of the package, but it was just an innocent friendship.
However, the feeling I get is I'm just in between the two of them and their relationship.
They both belong to the same hiking group, so ...
My Boyfriend Wants BDSM
I read Mars & Venus In The Bedroom, but I missed the chapter on the rough stuff. I saw you do an interview where you mentioned 50 Shades of Grey and I loved your perpective on it. So I am hoping you can help me.
My boyfriend wants to do BDSM.
Is this okay?
I am afraid it might hurt our relationship.
What do you think?
Wow. Thanks for writing in Maya. I don't think I have ever written about BDSM. I have spoken about it many times though....
How Long Should A Man Stay In His Cave?
I have been in a relationship with an amazing man for about 7 months now. He's 27 and I'm his FIRST serious gf.
I found it hard to believe at first because he's been such a wonderful bf to me and totally knows what he's doing. In the past few months, I've experienced him "caving" and perhaps "rubber-banding". I can usually tell when it starts and know the steps I need to take when it happens, such as giving him space, leaving him alone, ...
Does Mr. Right really exist?
Dear Lauren, I am a victim of huge expectations. So, lately I’ve been thinking…is there really a Mr. Right out there for everyone? And if there is, how can I change this fear of mine that he is impossible to find? -Alicia Hi Alicia, I believe in Mr. Right and I believe that there is at least one for every single lady who is ready for love. The figure of Mr. Right is all very mysterious and sometimes he is hiding under a mountain of absurdly idealistic expectations. So lets d...
How to avoid the ultimate boner kill
How is it okay for a woman to express how her feelings got hurt to her insensitive boyfriend but if a man does that to his girlfriend, he is considered weak and needy? That’s a double standard and it’s not fair. I’m calling you out.
Well Ted, when you put it like that, I’m ready to grab my pitchfork and protest right along side you. That doesn’t sound fair AT ALL.
However, I think you may be missing 2 key nuanced points in this ...
How to get closure in 8 simple steps
I’m just out of college and I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2 years. Last week he told me he didn’t know if he was in love with me anymore. It broke my heart. I still really love him and I know he is going through a hard and confusing time right now. He has gone into his cave now to essentially discover if he loves me or not.
Waiting for someone to break up with you is awful. I just can’t believe this could be over, I cry all the time. Should I brea...