Sorry for disturb but this question confused me so much. I broke up with my boyfriend last year.I love him very much but in the end he said he doesn't has feeling to me anymore plus we're in the long distance relationship.We have been together almost 3 years. I try very hard to save this relationship but in the end I end these up because I can't take it anymore. It's so hard to me .I just can't feel his love. I don't know it's the rubberband theory or not? he used to be so loving but once he study in other state, he changed. Even now I still can't forget him and it's still hust when i meet him in whatever occasion. Please tell me what can I do. I bought starting over book but still I can't let it go. My parent marriage also broken. Sometimes I scare if I'll be alone forever. I find myself not loving by others. Please help me . Thanks a lot.
I am sorry that you are having a hard time letting go. Letting go of people we love is hard and can drag out and it hurts. You did make a decison to end the relationship and all the reasons you gave were valid reasons to end a relationship. You weren't feeling loved which means you weren't feeling connected. Long distance relationships are hard and they can be done but the two people involved would need to have some solid mature relationship skill sets. Meaning long distance relationships aren't for everyone.
Since you iniated the break up there is a part of you that knows that you weren't getting what you truly know you deserve. That's a good thing. You have strength there. Renee, you were with this person for 3 years ! That is a long time. I understand that now it looks and feels like you will never find another realtionship again and you won't unless you surrender to what is and let it go. Letting go is different for everyone but mine has always involved a higher source or belief that I can surrender the things that I cannot control. You cannot make people love you or want to be with you. And why would you? Try to break the chains that you are so afraid to break. How is anyone else going to be able to get close to you when you are set on a person that has stated he does not want you. Dear Renee, the world is waiting for you. You have things to do, goals to accomplish. There are so many disasterous things in life, lets not make a man one of them.
March on into your life, learn to want to be with YOU and nurture yourself. Surrender your thoughts and feeling about the person you will always love. Wish them well so that you can be well. Good luck !