Better Sex for Men 1

John Gray

The best sex to a guy is usually when he can give her an orgasm. This causes him to feel successful and appreciated. So when I talk about ways for men to have better sex, I usually talk pabout how he can stimulate her the most.

When I interview women about what they want most from a man, again and again they tell me they want a lover with a slow hand. A man needs to remember that to increase a woman’s pleasure, he needs to delay direct stimulation. It will take longer and sometimes it will seem as if nothing is working, but eventually her pleasure will be much greater. If he takes this extra time, not only will she be happier, but he will also experience greater pleasure. Even if his passion is mounting, he should take a long time. This restraint and control allow her to feel more free to release her inhibitions and let go of control.

Great sex reminds both men and women of the tender and highest love that originally drew them together. It increases our attraction to each other, stimulates greater energy, and even promotes better health. The alchemy of great sex generates the chemicals in the brain and body that allow the fullest enjoyment of one’s partner. Men who experience regular sex have a higher testosterone level, which leads to greater confidence, vitality, strength, and energy.

Using nonverbal cues to initiate the sexual dance is a great way to eliminate hurt feelings or rejection, because it allows the other person time to notice and emotionally prepare for sex later that day. It also turns on a women as she anticipates the romance later that evening.

I suggest a technique that uses three candles. Two are the same—one for each of you. The third candle is larger or a different color.

If you’re in the mood, you light your candle to let your partner know you’d like to have sex that day. When your partner sees your candle lit, if he or she is not necessarily in the mood and a quickie would suffice, then he/she will respond by just lighting their candle. If your partner sees your lit flame, and he or she would like a longer, more intimate sex session then he/she will light his/her candle, and the center candle.

The candle technique respects a woman’s need to take time to be sexually aroused. It also is a great way to playfully get in the mood, or if it’s not happening, to then just be present and a part of the other’s arousal, regardless of whether or not you reach orgasm. It eliminates pressure or the fear of rejection.

This technique really works. Plus, you have the added benefit of lit candles for romance too. Just make sure that you also schedule and plan for romantic sex—with a candlelit dinner, body massages, flowers, etc., too. What makes sex really great is love. The more you get to know someone and continue to grow in intimacy and love, the more the sexual experience has a chance to thrive.

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  • John Gray
     8/2/2016 12:20:30 AM
    Hey Bigsteel - Check out the link above 'CLICK HERE to learn more about the products discussed in this video.' Vitex is an affordable and helpful form of chasteberry extract. I hope this helps!
  • Bigsteel
     8/1/2016 11:36:38 AM
    I see you sell the Tungkat Ali. But where do I find the others? Chase. Berry? Etc...
  • HoneyBee
     12/6/2013 8:15:40 AM
    What about a man who finds it difficult to orgasm as often as he would like? My beloved is 73 and the longjack formula has given him back his ability to rise to the occasion, pretty much whenever he wants. His staying power is fantastic. But it is not as often as we would like that he is able to have an orgasm. When he does, it's fabulous. He is such a tender, loving, vital, healthy, sensual man who gives such pleasure to me. I just wish he could more often join me in the full experience of our bond. Thoughts? ...

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