Do Soulmates Exist? (And How to Connect With Yours!)

advice: dating lauren gray

Dating is exhausting, and I’m sick of it! Are you there yet? Are you even wondering, “Do soulmates exist?” at this point?

They do, by the way. And in this post, I’m going to show you how you can get your hands on one!

You’ll learn who your soulmate is, how to recognize them, what gets in the way, and how to create a soulmate-level relationship.

Do soulmates exist? Is the perfect match a myth? I’m pretty sick of searching.

– Alicia


Here’s the thing: We’ve put “soulmate” and “Mr. or Ms. Perfect” on a pedestal for so long and piled it so high with unrealistic expectations that we can’t recognize the thing when it’s right in front of us.

Do soulmates exist? YES! In fact, everything in my life leads me to believe we have one or more soulmates and multiple chances to connect with them! The universe is abundant. It’s more about recognizing them for what they are, getting rid of the stuff that clouds your perception, and creating a soulmate-level relationship using MarsVenus relationship skills.

That seems like a lot to do. So let’s break it down:

Who IS your soulmate? And more importantly, how can you get your hands on one?


Do Soulmates Exist? Yes. Who Is Yours?


Your soulmate is NOT a summation of the list of credentials you made up for the “perfect match.” He is NOT just any guy who says, “I love you.” He is NOT going to look like your favorite movie star and act like your favorite superhero. And he will not save you from your life.

Your soulmate is the man that meets your needs and contributes to your happiness. If you rely on a partner to meet ALL your needs, then you will doom your search to fail because you have unrealistic expectations.

Your job is to fill your life with love, support, family, friends, hobbies, and purposeful work. Then notice what needs are left over that are not being met. This small list of remaining needs is the realistic job description for your future partner.

If you both do your jobs well, you will recognize each other for what you are and be happy together.


Mr. Right vs. Mr. Right Now


As you grow and learn, your life and the priorities of your needs will change. Your version of Mr. Right will probably change as well. This process of learning and growing involves, what I call, a series of “Mr. Right Nows.”

Every year we change and grow into more evolved people. I find that I always manage to attract a new person (friend, mentor, colleague, teacher, difficult neighbor...) into my life that meets those needs and/or teaches me something I am ready to learn. These experiences take me to the next level.

When you are single, these teachers, cheerleaders, friends, and lovers can come in the form of Mr. Right Nows. The sum of these Mr. Right Nows will lead you to become the person you need to be to eventually attract your life partner.


Soulmates: There's a Right Time and Wrong Time


The truth is, there's a right time and wrong time to meet your soulmate. You may not be ready to meet him; he may not be ready to meet you.

I know you're anxious to meet your soulmate and start your life together, BUT if he's not ready for you, believe me, you don't want to rush it. Think of it like he's an undercooked piece of chicken. It will make you sick. You don’t want a piece of chicken that’s undercooked! Let other women deal with that mess.

When he is hot, ready, and cooked to perfection, you’ll connect. You will find each other. Meanwhile, get yourself ready and enjoy your time and development with some wonderfully charming Mr. Right Nows.


Date Like You're Shoe Shopping


When it comes to “the search,” compare the arduous dating process with the romantic and everlasting fun of shoe shopping.

That’s right. Date as if you are trying on shoes.

Have a sense of what you want, but at the same time, stay open-minded. One of those 3-inch heels might actually be comfortable! The flats that look the most appealing might rub your toes wrong. Sure, looks are important when it comes to shoes but the most important thing is: How do they feel? How do they make YOU feel? When you try them on, just try, (you are not committing to anything by saying yes to a walk around the store) to observe if they make you feel confident? Happy? Irritated? Small? Silly? Shy? Sexy? Relaxed? Nervous? Uncomfortable? Just observe. Don’t bother wondering if the pair of shoes “likes” you back. That’s just silly. And it certainly shouldn’t determine whether you like the pair of shoes!

If you feel any version of bad with the guy, then don’t go out with him again. If you feel any version of good with him, then let yourself be curious. If he calls you, great! This is your opportunity to either let him know that, “Yes! I’d like to see you again,” or, “Thank you so much for the date. It was lovely to meet you. But I’m not interested in pursuing the friendship any further.”


The Myth of “Perfection” and Why You Really Don't Have to Worry


Do soulmates exist? Yes. But finding your soulmate is a process. It’s important to never let your impatience to find that special person distract you from the REAL journey: one of your own self-realization and development. Stick to your path, and you will invite your soulmate in at the perfect time.

Or not. :-)

Maybe it’s the wrong time, maybe they’re an “undercooked piece of chicken” and you’ve already met, or maybe you feel you’ve already missed your chance with the perfect person — it’s still all good.

Let me tell you a story.

My parents dated years before they finally got together. They dated and then split up because my dad wanted a child and my mom, who already had two children from her first marriage, didn’t want another — at least not with a man who she didn’t feel was ready for that responsibility.

So, my dad married another woman, and after a few years, got divorced.

He found my mom again, proposed within a month, she said yes, and right after the proposal, they found out they were pregnant with me.

They were married 33 years. An epic love story that led to the creation of a book that has helped over 50 million people around the world create their soulmate relationships — not to mention show me how to create my own epic love story. My mom passed away in 2018, and we miss her very much.

This is my proof that soulmates always find each other, spanning years and other relationships, missed opportunities, and different paths. My parents found each other. That’s how I know you don’t have to worry.


Don't Wait for Your Soulmate to Create a Soulmate Relationship


Best advice I can give you is to start now. Don’t wait for your “soulmate” to create your soulmate relationship.

You never really know what you’re working with until you learn relationship skills.

MarsVenus relationship skills allow you to recognize what expectations of the opposite sex are realistic and what expectations are not. These skills allow you to approach your dates differently to bring out the best qualities in them. When you know how to get your needs met from the beginning, you learn what man is capable of meeting them right away.

So, try on a bunch of shoes, fill your life with love, support, and happiness — and STUDY UP, my friend!

Trust that your soulmate is out there and on their way. Will you be ready?


With love,


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