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Initiating sex: who's job is it really?

Dear Lauren,

Within the couple, who is supposed to initiate sex?


Hi Charles,

Who initiates sex and Why

Both. Either. Everyone.

I’m going to answer your question more specifically but I want to make it very clear that this is not a one-size-fits-all response.

It’s in trying to make sex a one-size-fit’s-all concept that causes so much of the confusion, misunderstanding, shame and frustration between couples in the bedroom.


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The wrong way to have sex!

Hi Lauren,

After a year of waiting to see if my ex boyfriend might change his mind about getting back together, I now know that he definitely does not want to be in a relationship with me again. He contacted me out of the blue and asked to meet for sex. I still love him, so I agreed. It was wonderful, but short. Two weeks later, he asked to see me again for sex. I obliged, convinced that he secretly still loved me. The problem is that I can’t just have sex, I need more but he told me ...

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12 saucy (and realistic) ways to keep the passion alive.

Dear Lauren,
My fiancé and I are getting married soon, and I want to keep the passion in the bedroom alive. Can you give me some tips on how to do this as lately I feel like my libido has dropped and I feel like I'm not giving him enough intimacy?

Hi Lana,

Don’t feel bad. Lots of women have a hard time keeping up with their sweeties. Men usually have higher libidos than women because they have more testosterone. Testosterone is the "let's make sex...


How to avoid the ultimate boner kill

Dear Lauren,

How is it okay for a woman to express how her feelings got hurt to her insensitive boyfriend but if a man does that to his girlfriend, he is considered weak and needy? That’s a double standard and it’s not fair. I’m calling you out.


Well Ted, when you put it like that, I’m ready to grab my pitchfork and protest right along side you. That doesn’t sound fair AT ALL.

However, I think you may be missing 2 key nuanced points in this ...

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3 sure-fire ways to fully enjoy intimacy

Hi Lauren,

I am 33 years old and I’ve never had an orgasm during intercourse. What do I need to do to have one? Do I have a disability down there?


Hi Maria,

The world has been lying to you

You do NOT have a disability.

Surprise! Only 30% of women orgasm from stimulation to their G-spot alone.

You wouldn't know the number was that low based on T.V., movies and porn because the women we see there ALWAYS orgasm from sex.

Unfortunately, med...

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